Project: The TDC Community Project
|
Posted By
|
Message
|
dndfreak
Registered
11/01/2009
Points
650
|
*bows* thanks guys  Again, I didn't write out full dialog just yet because it may have to refer to other planets which don't exist and depending upon the amount of levels we get I may be able to squash/stretch it but that's what it is so far.
Vegeta? What does your mother say about my power level?
ITS OVER 9000!!!
|
aphant
Registered
18/05/2008
Points
1242
|
That's what I'm talking about
Ohhhhhhhhh. I'll give my story concept another whirl and hammer out something like that, then.
|
dndfreak
Registered
11/01/2009
Points
650
|
Adam, I actually took the time to read that monstrosity of a cutscene and well, wow. It looks like you put a lot of work into it but it really doesn't fit with the engine. The game is supposed to be more open-world and less linear. Your setup could be good for another type of game but it doesn't seem to fit well here. Plus, you need to fix the learning curve a bit. For example, the railway repair segment. You could make it so that the railway is attacked while the player is merely overseeing the shipment. That way, it cuts down that enormous length AND throws in another plot twist. Plus, are you really going to have a level where you need to repair the tracks? That doesn't sound too 'epic' to me. Plus, if they will attack my names, "scitee" for a city, "Jungel" for, well, duh, and Mechazzar for someone who builds mechs? Come on, you sound like pokemon.
EDIT: what do you guys think on these names?
You : Dovud
*1* : Garton
*2* : Phaes
*3* : Kinet
Vegeta? What does your mother say about my power level?
ITS OVER 9000!!!
|
aphant
Registered
18/05/2008
Points
1242
|
My story stuff above is pre-game stuff, back story. Lot's of it.
Plus, if they will attack my names, "scitee" for a city, "Jungel" for, well, duh, and Mechazzar for someone who builds mechs? Come on, you sound like pokemon.
Scitee is obviously placeholder. Jungal is almost sanskrit, jangala is the sankrit word for jungle. Mechazzar is a pun of sorts. Mecha, being things of mechanical nature, and czar, like a ruler. He's the king of all things mechanical!
But yeah, that's all backstory that focuses more on establishing why plot points are going to happen instead of having it just happen. I'm writing part two, "The Plot Thickens," on and off as I collect these stupid candy hearts for Love is in the Air.
|
dndfreak
Registered
11/01/2009
Points
650
|
I know but the point is you need to fix what's there first. It may be good, but we aren't writing a book here. Players aren't going to want to sit there for half an hour and watch some sprites arguing about what to do with a substance that they don't even know about yet. Also, unless the player is in the council, they shouldn't even see that scene in the first place. Let me guess, you want them to start play as that thief girl, right? What would she know about government? If you reveal this stuff when a person would really learn it, that's when people feel like they're part of the story. Use mine as an example- they have no clue about Count Valeron's treachery. That's because they shouldn't, and the player won't either. It helps build realism, suspense, personification, and the overall enjoyment that you'll want to achieve.
Vegeta? What does your mother say about my power level?
ITS OVER 9000!!!
|
aphant
Registered
18/05/2008
Points
1242
|
I don't need to fix anything. Writing a story for a game, movie, or play is only part of the process. Another part, and this one is the most important, is implementing it into the story. How will it be implemented? Just wait as I finish up this next book, and you'll see. And yes, it's going to be another book, because I will not and do not write C grade book reports.
Don't make assumptions, either.
|
Neuro
Ludologist
Registered
29/10/2006
Points
437
   
|
dndfreak, I don't think you're looking at Adam's story the right way. Your comment about the railway section is ridiculous - he's not implying that the player will be part of repairing the tracks, it'll simply be something that's happening in the background, and may or may not affect the game (how it would affect the game is a different matter, there are many possibilities). You're taking it all far too literally. Also, names are easily changed, arguing about them is not worth the effort at this stage.
Back to the main discussion...
The more WE know about the story, the better we can portray everything to the player. If we have an elaborate backstory, we can use it to create a believable world that isn't haphazardly thrown together - and having this elaborate story for everyone on the project to follow, we'll all have the same idea of what the game universe is like, and create content that fits together really well. I think we might need some concept artwork soon, too, some tests to see what everyone likes best. Having an idea of what things will generally look like may draw our minds closer together.
Maybe sorting out the backstory and creating the universe is the best idea at this stage, after all. Story events are very closely linked to the gameplay, and can be changed around, added or taken away quite easily, and if we have a firm foundation to build these events onto, then we'll end up with a much more solid game flow. Ignore what I said earlier about needing the events  I think we need backstory first. Planning is key, even when planning for plans, and our plans are still in the baby stages. dndfreak's little basic game-flow story is what we should end up with, but what we need right now is something more like Adam's detailed backstory - In fact, it sets the universe brilliantly, and I'd be happy to follow that as the basis of our game.
I kinda mashed a whole bunch of stuff together, I hope it makes sense.
n/a
|
Jon Lambert
Administrator
Vaporware Master
Registered
19/12/2004
Points
8235
     
|
Neuro's got the right idea here, about us knowing more about the story than the player will know at that point. We need to know enough that we can develop the world well, so that the player won't be like "That... doesn't make any sense." The more of the story we have developed, the better we can stay on track and make more of the story. It will also make it easier to make sure it makes sense, as we will then be building upon old structure as opposed to making things out of thin air.
What I am going to do now is ask that we start coming up with world structures and plot details. We have quite a few backstories/prologues now, so what you'll need to do (if you wrote a backstory) is to come up with the first thing that the player will experience in the game, then a tentative world structure with accompanying story elements. You don't have to do this by yourself though, remember, this is a community project, so help whoever you want. Examples would include:
Player wakes up in a jail cell. There are cracks all over the walls, but only one spot that looks like it can be broken. The player picks um a loose brick and smashes through. They now have to find their way through the rest of the penitentiary, fighting off guards and officers, and escaping through the front gate. They will then find themself on a hill far from town, which they will go down from to town, through a glade. In the glade, they find a person lying by a small pond, bleeding. They take them to town, but after the person recieves help, the player is revealed to the townspeople as a criminal. They escape the town and are presented with the first three worlds, the mountains, the ocean, and a desert.
In the mountains, the player scales the rocks for a while and finds a cave. Thinking it a good place to hide, they duck inside to find farther back two of the villians, harvesting phlog/lava/whatever. They don't like that their plan has been discovered, so there is a quick mini boss. These are two lesser villians, so they aren't very difficult or important. The player examines the setting to find machines that are programmed to harvest just a bit more at a time than the government regularly reports. One villian gets up and tries to attack, but the player ducks/dodges/is missed and they hit a machine, causing it to go haywire. It begins to harvest more than it can hold, and catastrophic meltdown occurs. The player must escape the cave and head further up the mountain. The cave will then be unaccessible until the player gets the pressure pack and pumps in enough pressure to break through the hardened phlog/lava/whatever. If the player has already been to another world, they will not find a reason to go into the cave, making that part optional. If the player already has the pressure pack, they will find the cave hardened over already, and need to break in to discover other vital information. Going over the other side of the mountain reveals three more worlds: the plains, a large city
At the ocean, the player will find a lone boat. They will use it to paddle away in hopes of being forgotten. They will find a large stray ship which they will board, saying that it is a much better mode of transportation. Upon exploring the ship, the player will find a crew who will explain that they were looking for a way to transport phlog/lava/whatever faster and more efficiently. The boat will offer to take you back to shore or take you to three more worlds that they were going to to find phlog/lava/whatever. Returning to shore will present you with a missed opportunity (that will eventually present itself again) and the requirement of going to either the mountain or the desert. Going with the crew will lead to three more worlds: the peninsula (a barren wasteland with underground caverns), the cliffs, or the industrial complex (where they both process phlog/lava/whatever and create the goods everyone uses). If the player goes to the ocean after the mountains or any world beyond the mountains, they will not find the boat. If the player goes there with the pressure pack, they will be able to use it to swim far and fast enough to make it to these places, and arbitrary undersea caves.
In the desert, one will find it to be freaking hot and will leave immediately. If the player comes here with the pressure pack, they will be able to move fast enough to get to scattered oases, and guard themselves from the heat.
Something like that. But less generalized worlds maybe, as in with names and better fluidity in transition between worlds. And not so short.
I'll also begin graphics discussion, to make concept art.
Sandwich Time!Whoo!
JoyCheck & KeyCheck Widgets
For easy implementation of customizable joystick and keyboard controls.
http://www.create-games.com/download.asp?id=8364
|
dndfreak
Registered
11/01/2009
Points
650
|
Alright, if we want to focus on some more unrevealed stuff...
Human life...
It expands at an alarming rate.
Some might say too fast.
Some might be right.
Expansion requires fuel, and lots of it.
We took it all for granted.
It took until the year 2158 that we ran out.
Humanity was stuck.
First, we burned up all of our fossil fuels.
Oil and coal disappeared.
With them all polluting Earth's atmosphere, the
heavy fog encasing parts of the world neutralized
the moons gravitational pull, our tides stopped.
Without waves or current, all of the dams became
useless hunks of metal. We lost hydro electricity.
All of our solar plants also collapsed due to the fog.
That's when the human race did what it does best:
We expanded more.
There was a scientist in his early twenties who suggested
something unheard of in centuries. He planned to use
a resource that was by far inefficient but had no hope of
dying out: steam.
He designed a special kind of battery to be used. It
was a foot-long capsule that contained a steam-heater on
one end. When the capsule was filled with water, the last
of the earth's fuels were used to ignite the heater, which
proceeded to generate it's own energy and then some. The
air-tight capsule refused to let any steam out so it simply
lifted itself to the other end of the capsule due to density.
This current allowed the steam battery to produce an infinite
amount of energy by cooling the water on the far end.
The scientist, Dr. Richard Melrose, then realized that
there was nothing left for humans on Earth and even the
very atmosphere was unbearable. That was when he started
building small vessels that ran on steam; vessels that could
withstand the pressure of outer space.
The first steamship, the Melrose, was built in 2160.
The Melrose was easily the size of a four-story building and was
able to carry five hundred people. It was built to do just that.
Dr. Melrose piloted the first space colonization with his steamship.
The Melrose first landed on a remote planed that the good doctor
himself named Athena. It was there that he set up a new form of
government, one that he led. Dr. Richard Melrose took a new title and
became the Lord of Marina. The Marinal Empire thrived for a time in peace
and fostered it's new home on Athena. But that would soon change.
As more and more people left the decrepit shell of a planet called Earth,
New factions and nations emerged. Also, the human race began to mingle with new
ones, ones that didn't like being evicted from their own planets.
It was for this reason that steam became the new gunpowder.
Steam lazers, guns, even chainsaws, all used for attack. Those without access to
surplus batteries (and those with the preference) began using swords or steel rods
to defend their heritage and race. That was the beginning of the end.
It wasn't long before the vastly outnumbered colonies drifted toward extinction.
Scared and afraid, all of the colonists turned to Melrose to help.
That was when Melrose entered battle himself. He wielded his new weapon-
the SteamMech. Designed to kill, He used his new invention as a symbol to scare
off any army who dared cross his path. Once in mass production, the wars
ceased.
Therein lies the problem. There were some who began to question the Lord's
decision to leave their enemies at peace with such a tool of violence.
The doctor stayed by his decision to end the wars and most of the war mongers
dissipated to other planets. They began a new nation, the United Front, a group of
colonies led by war activists. Among them was their leader, Count Valeron.
Valeron led his troops into Marina territory but was forced back without the
ability to produce batteries. That's when he tried a new tactic...
--------------------------------------
As said in earlier posts, Valeron began tinkering with his
own power sources and developed a hypnosis device, a steam
powered box with a hand plate that, when touched, could force
brainwaves of a certain frequency through the nervous system
into the victim's brain. Back on Earth, Valeron was an
esteemed neurosurgeon. He studied nerve impulses for years
until he found the one instinct he needed- trust. He could
induce undying loyalty in anyone and he chose Grisa, the heir
to the throne of Marina. This is where the story begins...
---------------------------------------
So what do you think? If I have to extend the story I'm thinking a
visit to Earth would do nicely. Plus, it would help to set the stage and the
flashbacks would work well. What do you think?
EDIT: wow Jon I didn't see that. Ok, so now that's done it's time to work on the
first cutscene/level in detail? Sure, no prob.
Opening scene:
*Narrator is speaking out a monologue while the screen flashes various pics/movies of the events*
"In the year 2158, mankind expanded to it's limits. Fossil fuels had been used up and their waste products polluted the water and soil. Earth was becoming a wasteland.
That's when Dr. Richard Melrose founded the Marina research team to find an easy way out of our decrepit hunk of rock. That's how steam, the only resource left, was put in a battery that charges itself. These steam packs fueled the new steamships on voyages into unknown space and new homes.
Upon reaching our new land, Weapons, old and new, were manufactured to keep the natives at bay. Among these were custom Mechs built by Melrose himself. He used them to strike fear in any threats and secured a place in the world.
That's not to say that peace was restored. Among those that strived to end all war, there was a group of activists called the United Force that wanted the opposite. Their leader, Count Valeron, had long given up a direct confrontation. Never the less, positions like yours are still necessary."
*next, show Dovud outside the control room of the maelstrom.*
Melrose: *screams* Dovud!
*Dovud bursts into the room to see Melrose at the end of Grisa's sword.*
Grisa: Hello there, Dovud?
Dovud: What do you think you're doing?!?!
Grisa: Well, just what I was told.
Dovud: Who told you? I know you, Grisa. You don't take orders from anyone.
Grisa: You're asking too many questions, general. I'm sorry, but I can't keep you around. GUARDS!!!
*Grisa throws the sword at Dovud, He catches it ant the guards enter*
Grisa: He killed the Emperor! Seize him!
*Dovud runs out a second door and the soldiers follow. At this point, the player takes control of Dovud and the tutorial begins*
---------------------------------
there you go
Vegeta? What does your mother say about my power level?
ITS OVER 9000!!!
|
aphant
Registered
18/05/2008
Points
1242
|
Alright, because I've been feeling pressed for time, here are the notes for the plot I've been working on for the last few days. It's quite concise and doesn't have any major plot spoilers!
(cut)
|
dndfreak
Registered
11/01/2009
Points
650
|
wow, and your first submission was so detailed. I was actually kinda interested to see what you'd do and was shocked for the wrong reason. seems like we switched roles
In all seriousness, I suppose this'd be cool but you lost a lot of the detail that makes the story the story, we need more than just a "this guy wants to hurt this guy" thing. In fact, you mentioned not a single antagonist by name in that post.
Vegeta? What does your mother say about my power level?
ITS OVER 9000!!!
|
aphant
Registered
18/05/2008
Points
1242
|
"Alright, because I've been feeling pressed for time, here are the notes for the plot I've been working on for the last few days."
This is a cleaned-up (less vulgar) version of the things I jotted down to plan out the overall story. The real document is much more detailed than this. I only posted these notes because we're kind of at a stand-still and I'd really like to see things getting moving again. Also, in the recruitment thread Jon Lambert posted, OldManClayton said that he couldn't read the long posts, so these notes cater to that.
Lastly, of course there aren't any villains listed by name. This is cut from the design doc where all of the antagonists and protagonists are listed just before these blurbs.
|
Knudde (Shab)
Administrator
Crazy?
Registered
31/01/2003
Points
5125
     
|
I just came up with something that would fit very well in the theme. Steamglobes. Basically a tennis ball sized high pressure container. These would be useful for the switches, and I'm specifically thinking about using them as Keys/Ammo. Think of them like the bottles in Zelda. It's rare when you come across one, but you can fill it readily everywhere. The key would then become to get the proper pipe adapter to open these doors. (The mainsteam pressure has failed in a facility, so all the doors have backups that can be powered by steamglobes.)
It's not entirely in line with what you guys are talking about, but I figured it wouldn't hurt to toss it out there.
Craps, I'm an old man!
|
dndfreak
Registered
11/01/2009
Points
650
|
Hey Adam the layout version I submitted was the same length so don't tell me it isn't doable. Regardless, I'm not trying to insult you or anything, just that I expected something longer due to your track record.
Shab, that should probably go into the "programming and features" thread.
Vegeta? What does your mother say about my power level?
ITS OVER 9000!!!
|
aphant
Registered
18/05/2008
Points
1242
|
I've pulled my story stuff. It's unwise to offer an idea if you're not willing to see it get cut. I've put too much time planning this story to see it get butchered. So, I've pulled my story stuff, because the last thing I want is a steam-powered spaceship ruining my brainchild.
|
| |
|
|
|
Advertisement
Jon Lambert