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Review: PunchIT
Author: AsparagusTrevor
Added: 20/09/2004
Overall:
Average:0/10

Well here's the masterpiece known as Punch It. I say 'masterpiece' because it is such a prime example of shit in computer data form.

After the 10 minutes it took to download (yeah, people still insist on using Freewebs) it was pretty easy to run the 'game' as the creator Cam-Cox/Down Town Dragon/Jackass didn't put the single EXE file in an installer as some people do.

Well I ran the game, no title screen or anything, straight into the 'action.' We are presented with a five year old's representation of the Elephant Man and we get to control what looks like a piece of ciabatta bread and then click on Mr Merrick causing him to twitch.

The fighting engine is the best thing in this game, featuring a true-to-life regional damage system. Click on his face (the deformed cirle with eyes) and his head flinches in an amazing 1 frame animation. Click on his body, and he twitches as though you've prodded him with a stick. Click on his groin, and his crotch realistically glows red in a spectacular 4 frame animation. There is even a baseball bat floating at the top left of thew screen, which, like in real life, you can take a chunk out of someone's head for a split second just by clicking the bat.

There is even a sub game when you get bored of the actual main gameplay. Using the same mouse driven controls, you have to click the Punch It icon and
hold the left mouse-button down, then drag the icon over to Recycle Bin and let go of the mouse button. This is actually more fun than the main game.

Aw fucking hell, come on. Sarcasm aside, this is by far the worst thing ever seen by my eyes.

I have tried to score the game as realistically as possible. I couldn't give the graphics and sound lower than 1 because they were present in the game. The presentation, however, was non-existant, as was the gameplay, which was only mouse clicking. The lastability was nil, once I'd clicked the guy a few times, I couldn't stand it any more.

Cam, I beg of you - please donate your copy of MMF or TGF to a nursery for special needs children, where they will be able to get more out of the product than you can. Either that, or burn your hands off and never contribute anything to where other people can see it, ever again.

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